The hardest thing for me to deal with
Once the rehab doors were shut,
Was the feeling Donna gave me when she said,
"I'm sorry but…
It's for your own good, so you won't act
Before your mind decides.
If you should try to get up
Your body will not rise".
New staff comes and old staff goes.
They shift in quick retreat.
Each has his or her own plan
To keep me in this seat.
Here I sit in 208
With no charge nurse in sight.
I'm going to get this grey belt off
If it takes me half the night.
I know I'd promise everything,
If they'd let me try to walk.
I could do it by myself,
But they watch me like a hawk.
I've tried to undo all the straps,
To free myself, but then,
Along they come and shake their heads
And I'm back in again.
I told them it's good therapy,
If they'd let me try alone.
They just laugh and say to wait
Til Dr. Caldwell sends me home.
How can this be a time to rest.
Like it's made out to be
If I spend each night and day,
Just trying to get free?
Sometimes I think it's a mistake
And I am only dreaming.
Outwardly I must escape.
Inside my head I'm screaming.
I say, "I'm mending excellent".
They say "Just OK".
Restoration would be easier,
If they took this belt away.
The stairway's blocked. The "lift" is still.
Yet I am permanently "chaired".
I have to stay in this damn thing,
Until I've been repaired.
I think I found the remedy…
The most effective one around.
The next time that they let me loose,
I'll tie the nurses down.
They'll plead and cry, but I won't hear.
They'll know that I have got
Their safety first and I will say,
"Gee, I'm sorry but…".
When you physically restrain a patient,
You've clipped their wings you know.
You've left them with no time to rest,
And with no space to grow.
Bev Bryant from In Search of Wings